Tomorrow is The Big Day

I'm a little bit on edge.  Even though I'm having a c-section it's still scary, I still have to have a needle poked into my spine, a hot knife put on my stomach, a child taken out of my stomach, and the recovery that all comes with it.  I don't care if people think it's soo much easier than a natural delivery, it's still scary.  So right now I'm feeling it.  And Max will be away for 4 days, which always worries me, I'm use to be the one controlling the situation and helping him along, but now I'm not.  Yikes.  His new thing is climing onto the changing table and then sitting there cause he doesn't know how to get down.  My worst nightmare is him falling on his head again and then us taking him to the ER.

But Max has been so much more pleasant since his ear infection went away and he's been really helpful around the house.  I think he's going to miss my baby bump.  He likes laying on the couch next to me with his head on my stomach as I play with his hair.  The baby always kicks him in the head cause he can sense the pressure, but Max doesn't seem to notice.  Hopefully everything goes well tomorrow and God will bless us with the health and recovery that baby Brooks and I will need.

4th of July....In Memorium

So I couldn't help but think about my Dad on the 4th of July, since it's been exactly a year now from when he passed.  

But I'm reminded that our little boy is coming next Thursday, and I couldn't help but feel more than anything today that Dad is helping him prepare for this life, and all the ups and downs that come with it.  

Dad and Mom

I really miss him, but I know that he watches out for us, and keeps us as a family close together. 

Dad and I back in 2006, right before I went to the MTC.

My Dad the baller.

Max loves basketball, and I know as a fact that he didn't get that from Jake or I......I wonder where that comes from?

He was always a cowboy at heart.

Every summer was a fishing trip to Canada.  I think that's about as hardcore he ever got out in the wilderness. 

Dear Dad,

I miss you and love you, but I know your looking out for me and that I'll see you again some day, and that your in a much better world that is pain free and true.

Love,

Rachel